
(2-minute read)
“Lord, would you let me see a miracle that would take away my doubts?” At the time, I was 24 years old, and I had recently had a salvation experience with God. It seemed reasonable; God wanted me to believe without doubting. It took me years to understand why he didn’t do that miracle.
I have always had a fascination with the supernatural. As a young Christian, I would hear stories about miracles, and I wanted to be able to pray and have God perform one. I tried my best to have the feeling of faith, pray the right words, and think the right thoughts, but it was only on scarce occasions that anything ever happened.
Like most young Christians, I struggled with various temptations. As soon as I would feel like I had one under control, another would pop up. It was a daily struggle. I don’t remember the exact temptation, but I remember one day when I had difficulty not giving in. I thought God didn’t want me to do this. I prayed, “Lord, not my will but yours be done.” Suddenly, the temptation faded. Instead of trying not to revert to the past, I sought to move forward with God. Even though the end result of my actions was the same, this was much easier. After that, sin took up very little of my thinking. Instead, my thoughts are primarily on discovering what God wants. When temptation came, I prayed, “Lord, your will be done.”
I still failed the Lord far more than I would like to admit, but I discovered that I had found the key to something I wasn’t expecting. When I concentrated on finding and doing the will of the Lord rather than what I wanted, miracles began happening around me. I loved it, but I couldn’t control it. At the same time, the Lord started sending me to places I didn’t want to go, to be with people I didn’t want to be with and to do things I didn’t want to do. The Lord knew my heart, but I didn’t. He showed me in the real world, by walking the path he has chosen for me, the dramatic changes I needed to make in my character.
The main event is not miracles. It’s loving and trusting the Lord enough that we say, “Not my will, Lord, but yours.”

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