Walking the path

(2-minute read)

In my heart, I’ve worn the title “servant of the Lord” like a badge. This is common in Christian circles, as serving the Lord is an honor. But when I think of my own experience, I realize that God has rarely, if ever, treated me like a servant.

Primarily, he has treated me like a child. Less often, he treats me like a coworker, saying such things as what “we” would be doing that day. There have been rare occasions, particularly when I was alone in the car, when I would have a casual conversation with the Lord. Although they were a learning experience for me, they were the types of conversations I might have with a friend. I don’t deserve any of these, and the only explanation I can find is that he loved me since before I was born. His love causes him to look past my flaws and search for something good in me.

The hardest seasons, though, are when I go through a period of not hearing his voice or sensing his presence. It’s my least favorite way he relates to me, yet I’ve come to understand that everyone goes through it. I can’t help but wonder if even Jesus felt that on the cross. It’s no fun, but it’s necessary. During these times, it feels like God has abandoned me when nothing could be further from the truth.

A friend of mine who learned to fly told me something his flight instructor said before his first solo flight. The instructor made clear that the solo wasn’t for the instructor’s benefit; if he hadn’t believed the student was ready, he never would have sent him up. The solo flight exists for the student, so that everything learned becomes genuinely internalized. The student is changed forever. He takes off as a student and lands as a pilot.

That story resonates with me. It’s easy to follow the Lord when I can feel him beside me and hear his voice directing and encouraging me. It’s much harder to be a faithful servant when the master is away, and just as hard to live as his child, coworker, or friend when I’m on my own, with the pressures around me pulling me toward conformity with the world. Walking with the Lord isn’t just about learning. Far more importantly, it’s about becoming. What we become is not only important in this world, but it is also important forever in our life to come with the Lord.

Since I’ve come to know the Lord, I have always wanted to be his servant. Some servants are hired. Others serve because of debt. But then, some serve out of love for family, like Jesus did when his father sent him to redeem us.

The Lord is a good father and wants the best for me. He wants me to follow Jesus and grow into the fullness of what I can be, not only for myself but for him. He wants me to be a servant, like his son, out of love, as part of the Lord’s family, not as a duty.